In one of my private coaching calls this week, someone asked me this question;
So how do you trust when someone has broken your trust?
You may have the same question yourself, I know, I did have it too.
Trust is similar to love.
It’s a risk you are either willing to take and feel or not. But there is no in-between.
The risk of feeling love is grief. Because if that love ever ends or leaves, you are left with grief.
Yet, many of us choose to love our parents, our friends, our spouses, our children and even our pets.
We know losing them would stink, but we also know that loving them makes that eventual pain worthy.
The risk of trust is disappointment. Because if someone “breaks your trust”, you will be left with a big disappointment in your heart.
Deciding to trust is also deciding to let go of control.
By releasing control and expectations, you can dive into trust as many times as you wish to.
Letting the other choose whether or not, they will honour their word.
When someone “breaks your trust”, they are showing you who they are or, who they can be.
You are learning more about them.
You do not need to “set up walls” that separate you from them, especially if that “someone” is your relative or, a spouse.
But you do need to adjust your expectations and release control as trust does NOT equal control.
So how do you trust someone who has broken your trust?
It’s a choice.
You either do or, you don’t.
But if you decide to trust, let go of control.
Even if you get to be disappointed again, trust me on this one:
You will be ok.
Not a popular opinion, but a mature, well-thought-out one.