What if I told you the guilt you feel is generated by you? 

In today’s episode, I’m going to break down where your guilt comes from and life rules to change that feeling of guilt. You’ll walk away with the tools you need to get out of guilty mode. 

In this episode you will learn:

  • How guilt is a result of a thought error.
  • Grown-ups have to review and recreate the rules that they live by.
  • Bringing awareness to your guilt and substituting it with gratitude instead.

Thought errors

Guilt is created entirely by ourselves and you know what; it is a limiting and unpleasant emotion to have. 

This emotion is defined by our conduct and we also define the rules by which we live our lives. And those many times happen at an unconscious level, or they’re learned by others. I call them the house rules because my body is my house, my rules, and they happen unconsciously. You are going to need to create specific life rules that you can live by. 

A thought error is a way of thinking that seems real but is a mistake. In fact, if the thought starts with a “should” you can immediately say this is a thinking error. Some examples I hear from my clients are: 

  • “I feel guilty for not calling my dad on Father’s Day.”
  • “I feel guilty for not having to spend the weekend with my son.”
  • “I feel guilty for taking time off work when I’m mentally stressed.”
  • “I feel guilty for leaving my team to do my work.”
  • “I feel guilty saying no.”
  • “I feel guilty or bad for not offering help with my friend in need when my plate is full.”

The good news is that only you can bring yourself to feel guilty and only you can bring yourself out of it. At some point in time, every grown-up has to review and recreate the rules that they live by. How do you start recreating your new life rule?

The first step always is awareness

Bring awareness when you are feeling guilty. Next time you feel guilty, ask yourself, what thought was I having? And then ask yourself; what was going on with me? Where does this thought come from? What are the rules that I’m living by that lead to this kind of thinking? What new rule do I need to create that aligns with who I am?

Guilt is the absence of gratitude

To get out of guilty mode, spend some time in gratitude by inviting it in when you’re feeling guilty. It could be a really good strategy to start shifting things around in the way you’re thinking. In fact, I feel that gratitude is the remedy for everything in life and that if we can bring our minds to gratitude, we can easily shift our mindset from a negative, dark place to a light, fun-like and easy place.

If getting out of guilt is something that you would like to have support and guidance with, don’t do it on your own. Join us. 

My doors will be opening soon for the September cohort of my Reset Your Mindset group. I’m also going to be offering a Detox The Mind, five date live coaching in September, September 12. So if this is for you, if you are a perfectionist, attached to achievements, overdoing, constantly fed up with your own mind, wanting to get a break from thinking so much from feeling disappointed from being so hard on yourself. I want to coach you through that.

Here is my favorite toolbox to get you started on that Mindfulness road. Click here!